Not Me Monday

Okay, after reading these posts for weeks I am attempting my first one!

I did not attempt to clean my bedroom today. I mean, why would I do that? And, I certainly did not find my oldest had stacked chairs, boxes, and bins high enough to reach the highest shelf in my pantry and promptly pull down the Nesquik powder...and dump all over my white carpet. And, all over my white sofa...to play with their dump trucks.

And, no this has not happened before.

I also did not find pooped stained underwear on my bathroom floor. Certainly not belonging to a certain little boy who refuses to poop on the potty. Truthfully, I couldn`t be too awful mad, he did dump the refuse in the toilet and flush...and wipe his tushy.

I also did not find a poop smear on my floor that had been nicely cleaned by toddler hands. Ah, at least he used a wet wipe I guess.

Most certainly, we do not have a ghostly sleeper who sneaks into our bed in the dead of night. I assure you I have not rolled over to find a sleeping babe in my bed. No, not in my bed.

My kids are NOT picky eaters at best.

I did NOT find a mushy browned apple in between my sofa cushions...under the guise of two large throw pillows. And, most assuradly did NOT find a broken brown banana in the middle of my living room floor. I was NOT mushy and black. And, I did NOT mistake it for dog poop either. Sheesh folks. I am NOT that kind of mother.