Wednesday, November 16, 2005


It seems that when South Indian women take control of their lives they are demeaned by society. Kushboo, a famous actress, spoke out in support of safe sex. She told women to not have sex, but if they did wear a condom - duh. She spoke out in concern over the rising incidence of AIDS.

She encouraged women to take control of their sexuality. She was subsequently prosecuted, jailed, and fined for her comments. Even the townspeople gathered to condemn her. SHEESH.

Get the full scoop here{50C5C069-7D52-418A-8E9E-2BA016853E7A}&CATEGORYNAME=Indo-Pak%20stand-off


Vinayak said...

I've blogged Kushboo's original comments. You can see them on the following URL

A free translation with no recourse follows. If there are other Tamils, you are welcome to provide alternate / better translations. This translation may also be blogged / posted with some credit to me... but with no copyrights.. :

========= start kushboo's comments with some notes from me ==========

*From Sep 28 2005 India Today*

"Kushboo : ..Chennai *was* behind Bangalore with regard to women expressing sexual matters ...."
(Note : I've used "matters" here as her Tamil word does not exactly translate to desires).

Kushboo : ".....Now women in Chennai are also crossing these mental taboos on sexual matters. We get to see a lot of women (girls? ) in Pubs and discos (at Chennai). (These days) Women can talk freely on matters regarding sex. Slowly the woman is opening her wings and has started flying out in this restricted society. Still, accidents to women like Stephany raises some questions about how healthy this trend is?. Sex education is very essential in schools. Even if sex education is not provided in schools, parents have to teach their children about sex....."

Kushboo : "...For me sex is not just a physical thing. Its mental too. I can't understand how women can change their boy friends every week..."
(Note : Kushboo says that she can't accept this habit of changing boy friends per week.... NOT that this does NOT happen !!. That means there are many girls who have weekly boyfriends and Kushboo who is aware of pubs and discos must have a good overview of this.
Note : Its quite possible that after a few years, meaning 52 x 4 = 208 boyfriends when these new age women get married, they would get rather tired of men and soon seek the 498A route :-()

Kushboo : "....If a girl is going strong with her boyfriend, she can go out with him after informing her parents..."
(Note : No issue of seeking permission here. I've carefully read the Tamil word / words. It just says inform. Not seek permission)

Kushboo : "...If a girl has a Strong relationship, the parents have to allow that...."
Note : all about relationships BEFORE marriage. Social acceptance of the same etc... and then comes the clincher)

Kushboo : "...Our society has to be liberated from thoughts like "a woman has to be a virgin at the time of marriage". No educated man would expect his wife to be a virgin. However, women have to safeguard themselves from pregnancy or other disease, while having pre - marital sex....."
Note : So the issues are just physiological and economic at the maximum. don't get pregnant before marriage and don't be left holding the baby !!. The issue is NOT about chastity..

Kushboo : "...I married the man I was in love with. Since we were sure about our relationships, we had sex before marriage. Its now six years since marriage. Since we have two children, our responsibilities have grown. Since the children sleep in the same room as we do we need to find other private times (/moments) for us. Still we have a happy married life. Married people should know how to satisfy their spouse's physical needs. There would be no problems, if desires are understood mutually. ..."
(Note : She has had pre marital sex. She says she married the same person. She was an actress BEFORE she was married.)

Kushboo : "...Some people increase gratification by using sex books, photos etc. One cannot say that is wrong. At the same time At the same time, one should understand the other's likes, dislikes and comforts, discomforts. Men who mistake women talking about sex should change their views. Mutual consent is essential for sex. ..."
(Note : Last para is some general whitewash .. The whole interview speaks tons about pre marital sex, sex between partners, safe sex and so on. At one point she cautions women *not* to get pregnant by Pre marital sex !!)

========= end of Translation and comments =================


Vinayak said...

Results of the controversy : Kushboo and company

1. Pre Marital sex is here!. That's the truth. There is no denying it. That's the gist of what Kushboo said (not me!) Its NOT just metros or Mumbai or Delhi that the "pre marital sex" is happening. There are also extra maritals going on all over India

2. *Tamil Nadu is NO exception*. There are surveys that show that approx 40% of college students have had sex before marriage !!! Now please don't come back and tell me ONLY MEN had sex, and that too all by themselves...

3. Tamil movies have as much sex portrayed in them as bollywood movies. In fact there is a great competition there in showing more sex

4. What happens in Indian cities gets noticed and has a multiplier effect. It's soon followed by others in smaller towns and villages

5. The dress, the dance, the music... the cinema ... these have always moved from cities to towns to villages

6. So would this "sex" thing move to every place

7. Womens lib is calling this "freedom of expression" and *supporting Kushboo*

8. So to me it looks like Kushboo has a point. *Men who expect their wife to be a virgin are fools*


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